Hello, I'm Laura Ingraham, and today, I'm going to be reviewing the worst Justin Bieber album up to this point. Changes. My God, this album is atrocious. In fact, this was the album that almost made me turn in my Justin Bieber apologist card.
Okay, let me back up. In 2015, as those of you who saw my last review know, Bieber released my favorite album of his up to that point with Purpose. It was an interesting album, with lots of fun electronic-leaning instrumentation and some of Justin's most authentic lyrics to date. So, how did he follow it up? Simple. He didn't. At least, not for a long time.
After that album, Justin didn't release another album for five years. Sure, he had plenty of guest spots, but no actual releases. That is, until 2020, when he released Changes. That's right, after five years without an album, he followed up the excellent Purpose with an album that nearly made me turn in my apologist card. How he messed up that badly, I don't know, but he did. So, might as well get this over with. Time to tear this trash apart.
YI had low expectations for this album the minute I heard the lead single Yummy. In short, I hate this song. The beat is gross and sticky, much like candy that's been left out in the sun too long. Then there's the chorus, where Justin repeats the disgusting word Yummy until my ears bleed. The verses are mostly just boring, but even they have some stupid lines, including using the word litty and comparing his girl to Megan thee Stallion who would probably castrate Bieber if he called her his "yummy yum." I know I would.
Still, despite how terrible this song is, I'd still put it in the top half of this album if I were to rank it. Yes, it's bad, but at least it has the common courtesy of being an interesting disaster. To paraphrase a joke from Sean Fay Wolfe of Diamond Axe Studios Music, if Yummy is a train wreck, then the rest of this album is a train derailment. Annoying, a complete waste of time, and disastrous in a not particularly interesting way.
For a good example of what I just described, take the other big single Intentions. This song has a boring beat, personality-less vocals, and lyrics that make no goddamn sense. "Heart full of equity, you're an asset?" What does that mean?! Also, why is he shouting out this girl's parents for making her? This is the kind of song that would normally be a 3 or 4 out of 10 for me, but lyrics like those reach the uncanny valley for me.
When the lyrics on these songs aren't embarrassingly stupid, they're usually eerily clingy. Come Around Me, for instance, is a clinger's anthem. It's about how Justin wants this girl to always act like she misses him even when they've been around each other for a long time. Clingy much?
Other examples include songs like Available and E.T.A., both of which are about how Justin is unhappy when this girl isn't around. That's right, it's the "I love when you're 'round but I fucking hate when you leave" line from Sad! by XXXTentacion, stretched out into two full songs.
And yet, despite how terrible all of those songs are, none of them are the worst song on the album. That award goes to the utter atrocity that is Running Over featuring Lil Dicky. This is an attempt at a comedy song, I guess, which explains why Lil Dicky is on it, but there are two big problems with it. One, it isn't funny, and two, it's just as slow and dull as every other song on this album.
You might've noticed I haven't talked about the instrumentation much on this album. That's because there isn't really much to say. The song Habitual has decent instrumentation, I guess, until you realize that it and Available sound damn near identical.
In fact, that's a problem across this entire album. Intentions and Forever also have damn near the same beat. Seriously, all of these songs are made up of gutless trap beats, gooey synths, high-pitched vocal samples, and the occasional extremely basic acoustic guitar playing. Yummy is the only track here that stands out, and not in a good way.
Normally I'd talk about every single track on here, but on this album, what's the point? Every song on this album, with the exception of Yummy, has the exact same shit wrong with it. Dull, monotonous instrumentation, no personality, stupid and at times clingy lyrics, etc. So, I'll end this review by talking about the remix of Yummy that comes at the tail end of this album featuring Summer Walker. This version is even worse than the original by having a woman validate Bieber's shitty pick up lines instead of kicking him in the nuts like she probably should. Also, I hate Summer Walker's voice.
Overall, this album is fucking awful. There isn't a single good song on it. I give it a light 2/10, and it would get an even lower score if I could remember any of the songs in the long-term. This album nearly made me a Justin Bieber hater, and I will never forgive it for that. Oh, and in case it wasn't clear, it gets no recommendation. Even if you're a Justin Bieber fan, he's done way better than this. Fuck this album.
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